An Array of Letters

Dear Calvin,

Happy Birthday. You are my favorite 5 year old in all the world.

Dear baby inside of me,

Please step off my sciatic nerve. Step off.

Dear Chiropractor,

Thank you for whatever you did to me this morning. When I came in I couldn't walk, when I left I could walk. But seriously I have no idea what you did. It took 5 minutes. Could you teach my husband to do whatever it is you did?

Dear blood platelets,

Please increase in my body. I'd like to at least have the option of pain relief during labor.

Dear Eileen's Cookies,

Thank you for making ridiculously good cookies. I think almond extract is akin to crack.

Dear Charlotte,

I'm sorry it took me so long to get you to the doctor. I might be a little too laid back when it comes to ear infections. You can blame your brothers for this.

Dear Laundry,

Please fold yourself.

Dear Jesus,

Thank you for the weather today. Fifty degrees in February feels like 75 degrees in July.